Nobody arrested for felony spamming
by Sheriff “John” Arpaio • Thursday, Nov. 03, 2005 at 5:12 PM

Sheriff “John” Arpaio said that Nobody doesn’t have the right to defend himself because the charges are so severe. Sheriff “John” Arpaio also said he would not allow any jurors to vote for Nobody. John Arpaio said “Anybody who votes for Nobody gets booted. Nobody doesn’t get a fair trial!”

Sheriff “John” Arpaio said yesterday at a press
conference that Nobody had been arrested for
felony spamming. Sheriff “John” Arpaio said that anytime
anyone makes his deputies looks like fools and
criminals on internet sites they will be arrested for
felony spamming. One reporter at the press conference
asked, “Nobody’s posts about the bumbling crooked cops
and government idiots were all true. How come he was
arrested?” Sheriff “John” Arpaio replied, “Anybody who
makes my deputies look like idiots and thieves will
be arrested for felony spamming even if the
spam is the true. Nobody messes with me and gets
away with it. Nobody!”

Sheriff “John” Arpaio denied that Nobody had been
singled out for prosecution because of his Libertarian
and atheist beliefs and said “Yes I hate Libertarians
and atheists but Nobody wasn’t singled out because
he is a Libertarian and an atheist. Nobody was arrested
because he was making my deputies look like idiots.”

A sheriff’s deputy at the Maricopa County Jail who
refused to be identified and claimed to be the only
deputy in the Maricopa County Sheriff’s office who was
not a crook said, “I think Nobody is innocent. Nobody has
been screwed over by Sheriff ‘John’ Arpaio and other
people who don’t like him.” He also said that Nobody
somehow had rigged up an illegal internet connection
in his cell and would continue his posts about
crooked cops and other government thugs on the
internet. While numerous email have been sent to
Nobody at the time of the press conference he had
not replied to any of them.

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